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We won't sell your information to anyone or send you anything other than Beric'ht Talossan!
To be honest, we wouldn't even know how to go about selling your information.  We tried printing out some nonrandom 0s and 1s and taking them to the pawn shop, but the guy behind the counter just yelled at us.  He said he was sick of pranksters, and he waved a stick at us.  It looked like half of a pool cue or something, I don't know.  Whatever it was, it was definitely rude to shake it at us.  But we think that people might just be getting ruder these days, y'know?  On the way out, we took a bunch of his pens to make ourselves feel better.  They weren't good pens or anything, they were just cheap ballpoints.  But it's the principle of the thing.  Now we're going to keep all that guy's pens in a big bucket in our office, and people can use them.  Although one of them will probably burst and ruin someone's suit, and then we'll get sued.  As if we weren't already getting sued enough by disgraced former naval officers (not naming any names).  And even if they didn't sue us, they'd probably ask us to get the suit dry-cleaned, and it's just impossible to find a decent dry-cleaners.  Maybe they're all too busy for new customers.  Maybe all the rude people in the world are lining up ahead of us at all of the dry-cleaners.  Not that the two problems are necessarily related, but we believe in a sort of hidden order to the universe.  Anyway we won't sell your information or give it to anyone or anything.  That's all I was getting at.
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